Important Topics to Discuss Before Marriage (Thirumanathirku Mun Pesavendiya Mukkiya Vishayangal)

Before marriage, it is very important to openly discuss key topics such as finance, family, children, career, daily life, personal freedom, relationship expectations, beliefs, and communication styles. These discussions help avoid future conflicts and build a strong foundation for a happy married life. In Tamil Matrimony (Varan Thedal), many marriage issues arise not due to lack of compatibility, but due to lack of pre-marital communication.

1️.Finance & Money Management (Nidhi & Porulatharam)

Discuss financial matters clearly:
Income and salary details
Existing loans or debts
Savings and investments
Spending habits
Money management style (Joint account or Separate accounts)

2️.Children & Parenting (Kuzhandhaigal & Valarppu)

Talk openly about:
Whether you want children or not
Number of children
Parenting style and values
Education plans for children

3️.Family & Relationships (Kudumbam & Uravugal)

Family plays a major role in Tamil Marriage System:
Relationship with parents and siblings
Expectations from in-laws (Maamiyar / Maamanar)
How often you will meet or stay with family

4️.Career & Work Life (Velai & Thozhil)

Discuss career-related topics:
Career goals and ambitions
Work-life balance
Job transfers or travel
Impact of job on married life

5️.Daily Life & Responsibilities (Andrada Vazhkai)

Talk about everyday responsibilities:
Sharing household work
Cooking, cleaning, and routines
Food habits (Vegetarian / Non-vegetarian)

6️.Personal Freedom & Me Time (Thanippatta Sudhandhiram)

Healthy marriage needs space:
Personal time and independence
Friends and social life
Hobbies and self-growth

7️.Beliefs & Values (Nambikkaigal & Mathippugal)

Discuss core values:
Religion and religious practices
Political views
Honesty, kindness, and moral values

8️.Communication & Conflict Handling (Thagaval Thodarbu)

Understand each other’s communication style:
How you express feelings
How you handle arguments
Assertive, passive, or aggressive communication styles

9️.Love, Affection & Intimacy (Anbu & Nerukkam)

Discuss emotional and physical expectations:
Expression of love and care
Emotional bonding
Physical intimacy expectations

10.Life Goals & Dreams (Vazhkai Ilakkugal & Kanavugal)

Share your future vision:
Personal and professional goals
Dreams you want to achieve together
Lifestyle expectations

✅ Why These Discussions Matter in Tamil Matrimony

✔ Helps understand long-term compatibility
✔ Reduces misunderstandings after marriage
✔ Builds emotional trust and clarity
✔ Creates a strong, respectful marital relationship